It is something that many of us have become all too accustomed to lately. Fear is debilitating and strangely addicting. To many of us, it may even be somewhat comforting. Fear is an enigma. We look at fear as something scary as well as something that keeps us safe. For the past year, especially the last 6 months, I have been focusing more heavily on personal development and cultivating a growth mindset. During this period of self reflection I have learned a lot about my myself. I learned that fear is something I am all too familiar with. I cling to it and use it as an excuse to keep me stuck. Throughout my life I have acted more out of fear that I have out of love. Whether it pertained to breaking up with a friend or boyfriend, finding a job, socializing, etc., it was mostly done from a place of fear. For example, there were many situations where I went out with friends for the wrong reasons. Instead of going because I craved quality time with my loved ones, I went because I had a fear of missing out. There were times when I stopped talking to a guy not because I loved myself and thought I deserved more, but because I feared an even more negative outcome than me ending it on my own terms. I think a lot of the time it is really easy to act out of a place of fear and convince ourselves and others that we are acting out of love.
I recently started a new chapter of my life. I quit my job and am navigating this new normal of living my life more on my own terms. I want this next chapter of my life to be lived out of love and optimism. I don’t want to take a new job just because I haven’t had one in a while. I don’t want to miss out of travel and great experiences just because I am scared of spending money. I know that if I live my life from an authentic, loving, centered place, I will reach magical, mind blowing heights. To all of you who are living from a place of fear, be honest with yourself and give yourself patience and understanding. Fear is powerful and it is not something that you get over right away. It takes time and a serious adjustment to your mindset to be able to live without fear. Sometimes you may need to live in spite of it and other times you may just need a new perspective.
If you are unsure if you are living out of fear, these journal prompts may help you to get a better idea:
- What is the most dominant feeling you have when making a big decision?
- When was the last time you acted fully out of love?
- What thoughts go through your head on a regular basis?
Exploring your answers to these questions will help you to better understand yourself and the decisions that you make. I was not able to fully grasp the fact that I was essentially acting out of fear until I became conscious of my thoughts. The reality is, like most people, my default mindset has become super negative. I can’t live a positive, loving life if I am thinking and acting from a negative place. With practice and a constant effort to rewire your mindset, you can achieve more positive thoughts and results.
I hope we all can grow and learn to forget fear and live from a loving, confident place.
Let’s grow together.
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